Day 44: Why Kenya Was For Me

The eastern coast of Kenya at Mombasa

One of the first items of business Brian began our debriefing with was asking the entire GP team to explain "why Kenya was for me." So each of us stood up one by one and started our answers with some variation of: "The Kenya GP was all about me, because..." One of the biggest realizations I had on the trip was that Kenya was all about me, because really, it's not all about me. Amidst my selfish ambition and self-centeredness, there's not very much room left in my heart for me to love God or others. During IV's Chapter Camp of that year, one of the speakers said that true love requires sacrifice. I think I began to understand that statement during my time in Kenya. I've always said that anything that is worthwhile requires sacrifice, but I don't think I've ever really lived out that cute, trite little saying. If there's one thing that God instilled in me last summer, it's that true love really does require uncomfortable amounts of effort, tears, and sacrifice. If there's one thing I'm normally terrible at, it's giving up my own time and energy for the sake of others. Last summer, God really challenged me to think about ways in which I could make sacrifices for others and Him, thereby loving.

Later that day, Brian described in detail our reentry into the United States. He gave a chilling picture of what it would be like for each of us to end up in our airport terminals by ourselves waiting for our respective flights back home, to land back in our home cities, to see our loved ones waiting for us at the airport, to finally arrive back in our homes after 7 weeks. Of course, being a forward thinker, I had thought of there things before, but hearing Brian verbalize the future like that really made me both dread and look forward to going home.

I realized in that moment that returning home after a missions trip is probably one of the most difficult aspects of the trip. True transformation occurs once we return home and actually integrate our experiences into the way we each live our lives. In some ways, being spiritual and seeking God is almost easier on missions than at home. Here in Kenya, I'm always having serious conversations about God, culture, and what being a disciple looking like. Back home, I'm always having not-so-serious conversations about sports, girls, school, and food.

The challenge that lay ahead was how to continually seek God first in a culture where that sort of mentality doesn't exist. I know what general direction I want to go in life, but many things I experience in the America want me to go in an entirely different direction.